


About "Behind Sanity" (Original Version)

by nikkilittle



Category: American McGee's Alice
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-04
Updated: 2018-09-04
Packaged: 2019-07-07 02:16:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,118
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15898890
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nikkilittle/pseuds/nikkilittle
Summary: A book review of the original version of Lani Lenore's "Behind Sanity."  Once famous, its rewrite now rests in obscurity over at Wattpad.





	1. About "Behind Sanity" (Original Version)

About "Behind Sanity" (Original Version)

 

On December 25, 2006, I laboriously downloaded each and every chapter of the original version of Lani Lenore's "Behind Sanity" and then burned the files to two back-up disks. And forgot about them. I had no e-reader or tablet back then.

In 2018, I found the disks and remembered my two Aluratek Libre e-readers. I copied the files from one of the back-up disks to my computer, deleted the attachment folders, and then copied the plain html files into a newly created "Behind Sanity" folder on my e-reader. I was finally going to find out what all the fuss had been about.

I had always thought that the "shared hallucination" plot concept was silly and impossible to carry off successfully, but I wanted to see how far Lani had gotten before the plot blew up in her face. A few other commenters said the last five chapters. That was correct.

I had tried to read the story before on my computer, but computer screens are not so forgiving to the eyes. Especially to a near-sighted woman wearing reading glasses who was born in 1959. I don't remember how far I got the first time I read the story. I'm pretty sure I got up to the meeting with Caterpillar. I don't remember much after that. I know that I peeked at the last five chapters where some people said the plot fell apart. I agreed with them. Lani had done some advance planning in writing the story, but not enough. I think Lani wrote "Behind Sanity" (original version) on a purely chapter-by-chapter basis. I noticed that some people in the comments thought that the story was abandoned after what was "Chapter 40" in the comments but was actually Chapter 39.

This time I read the story fairly continuously over a period of a few days and was fairly impressed with the story up to Chapter 42. Then I saw Chapter 43 which I now call "The Saw Chapter." I call it "The Saw Chapter" both because of what happened in the chapter and because the chapter reminded of "Saw" movies which I have never seen in a movie theater or on DVD and refuse to watch. Torture porn is not my idea of fun. Chapter 43 in the original version of "Behind Sanity" was triple-X torture porn. It was the sickest, grossest, nastiest thing I had ever seen in American McGee's Alice (AMA) fanfiction. I stopped dead in my tracks reading. It took me a few days to cool off and go back to read the last few chapters. I was so close to the end that I wanted to see if the plot fell apart.

Yes, the plot fell apart in the last five chapters. It was never explained how Alice recognized the Red Queen in the real world. The explanation of what Wonderland was in Chapter 47 was so silly it was another reason to abandon the story. The last eleven chapters of the original version of "Behind Sanity" were a complete disaster. No wonder Lani took a long layoff before finishing it. I think she knew she had written herself into a corner. But she came back and finished it. I think "Behind Sanity" became famous because it was the first full-length AMA fanfiction novel with a credible plot and an author who had a gift for atmosphere.

Does the original version of "Behind Sanity" deserve its fame? I think the first 42 chapters of the book do indeed deserve the fame lavished on the book. "The Saw Chapter" ruined the book for me. Not everyone will agree, but I thought the chapter was torture porn. I thought it was disgusting. Because of "The Saw Chapter" and the last eleven chapters in general, my verdict on "Behind Sanity" is thumbs down. Maybe Lani fixed the plot flaws in the rewrite of "Behind Sanity," but I know that "The Saw Chaper" is still in there. Over at Wattpad, "The Saw Chapter" is now Chapter 52. Lani left the horrid chapter in. Ain't going to read it. Nope. Never. Thumbs down again.


	2. My Comments Posted at Fanfiction Dot Net

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The comments I posted at Fanfiction Dot Net.

Nikki Little Comments on "Behind Sanity" (Original Version)

 

nikkilittle Aug 25 2018

Sometimes it pays to go scavenging through old backup disks. I found two disks with a complete copy of the original "Behind Sanity." I had painstakingly downloaded each and every chapter as an html file. The files all have a date of 12/25/2006. Yes, Christmas Day in 2006. Back then I had no e-reader, and it was hard to read such content on a computer.

Now I have an ancient Aluratek Libre with no wireless card on it. A retro throwback that you have to connect to your computer with a USB cable. I created a folder on my e-reader and loaded all of the html files without their attachment folders into it. The html files work much like TXT files. It is so much easier to read on an e-reader. I'm up to chapter 20 already, and it has been a fascinating read. Highly atmospheric and reminds me of Kount Xero's writing.

The first creak I saw in the shared hallucination plot was in Chapter 11 when Cheshire slashes Tommy on the face. Everybody is awake and Tommy has no connection to Wonderland. Logically, this scene is impossible unless Wonderland is "real." I let it pass as Alice hallucinating and scratching Tommy in the face herself. Nevertheless, this is the first creak in the plot. I haven't seen any more creaks in the plot, but I'm sure there are more coming in the original version. I'm glad Lani realized that this story was worth the effort of a rewrite to correct the old plot flaws. I wish the rewrite were available somewhere that would let you download a file to load on an e-reader. On Wattpad, I can only read on a computer as I do not own a tablet or an internet-connected e-reader with a web browser. I'd pay for a printed copy of the rewrite of "Behind Sanity."

nikkilittle Aug 26 2018

The chapter with the meeting with Caterpillar was fascinating and well-written. I appreciated finding out what the rumbles in Wonderland were. I suppose finding Caterpillar marks the half-way point in the story.

The chapter with the Centipede fight struck me as rushed. Alice still has only two weapons - the knife and croquet mallet - and she still seems a weak character who relies too much on dumb luck and being rescued by Cheshire. The Centipede fight came too early. Where are the cards and the all-important ice wand?

The "shared hallucination" plot is still holding up.

nikkilittle Aug 27 2018

Now in the funhouse. The funhouse part is fascinating. Alice has two new weapons: the cards and the jacks. I like how Alice obtains weapons more logically than in the game. Alice gets the jacks from two insane children instead of just stumbling into the jacks behind a broken mirror. The nightmare spider attack was well-done although, as usual, Alice was caught off-guard. Interesting revelation about her body when her consciousness goes back to the real world. Also interesting was how her wounds heal in Wonderland. The rape scene was horrific. FF dot net would definitely now consider this fic to be MA material. Good that anything they'd object to was removed. Nobody in their right mind could object to the first six chapters which are still up.

The chapters between Alice's meeting with Caterpillar and arrival in the funhouse were not so good. There were several rough transitions in which Alice blacks out and reawakens somewhere else in Wonderland. Alice doesn't know how she got there and neither does the reader. The worst was the transition from the Red Chess Realm to the funhouse. That was the worst transition in the game as well. I still think there's a missing second Red Chess level that takes place in the area where the White Queen lost her head. The chapters between the Caterpillar meeting and the funhouse look as though they were written in a rush to get to the funhouse section.

Nikki Little Aug 28 2018

I found a continuity error. Alice left the croquet mallet behind in the funhouse and never went back to retrieve it. Yet the croquet mallet shows up in a later inventory of Alice's weapons.

I'm downright disturbed at the casual way that Alice leaves weapons behind. She left the ice wand behind in Hatter's domain and the oversized hammer in Wonderland Woods. She comes across as a real dimwit to me. Probably to Cheshire, too. Later she leaves behind the jackbomb, too, but I suspect it was a one-use weapon in this story. 

One of the Wonderland residents is dead in the real world, but alive in Wonderland? This pushes the shared hallucination concept past its breaking point. Not buying it.

Nikki Little Aug 28 2018

The first Jabberwock fight was a big disappointment. Alice didn't fight at all. Rescued by Gryphon as in the game. In this story, however, Alice doesn't even throw the jacks once. At this point, I wonder why any of the Wonderland creatures believes that she can defeat the Red Queen. They have to keep rescuing her just to keep her alive. The only big battles Alice has fought so far are the Duchess and the Centipede.

On the other hand, the scene with Humpty-Dumpty was a big improvement over the game. Humpty speaks! Alice gets the first piece of the all-important Jabberwock Eyestaff in this area.

Gryphon is completely in character. The same proud and fearless beast as in the game.

Nikki Little Aug 28 2018

I've finished Chapter 41 and the shared hallucination plot is still holding together. I'm quite surprised. The only real missteps so far have been the Cheshire Cat scratching Tommy in Chapter 11 with everyone awake, the idea that a Wonderland resident could be dead in the real world and still alive in Wonderland, and Lani's failure to give the Wonderland residents quirks or characteristics that would make them identifiable in the real world. It's absolutely essential that Alice can identify the Red Queen in the real world to make the plot work.

There has been an over-reliance on coincidence in the plot. The scene in which the Hatter shows up in the school struck me as utterly contrived and out-of-place. The escape from the ambush in the school auditorium, however, was so clever that I'm amazed that American McGee didn't "borrow" it for Alice Madness Returns. Lani obviously has some knowledge of how theater sets work.

In Chapter 41, Lani reveals explicitly why the Wonderland residents believe Alice is "The Champion" in spite of her bumbling. She is the only resident of Wonderland outside of the Red Queen's control. If other residents of Wonderland die in Wonderland, their characters are replaced with new souls. This is not true of Alice. Alice always returns completely healed.

nikkilittle Aug 29 2018

Lani, what you did to Alice in Chapter 43 was so sick, gross, and nasty that I am inclined to quit reading right here. What you wrote was NC-17 violence p*o*r*n of the sort that shows up in "Saw" movies. When Professor Spooky had Hatter drill a hole in Alice's head, I posted what I'm sure was only the second public flame I've ever posted. Now you're getting the third. I've been on ff dot net since 2007. This was sick. This was gross. This was unnecessary. With this chapter in the story, I would not recommend reading "Behind Sanity" to anyone. I'm astounded that the story is famous with this in it. I can only hope that you had the good sense in the rewrite to remove this horrible scene. Adios, Lani. I'm gone.


	3. So What About Reading "Behind Sanity"?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Is "Behind Sanity" Worth Reading?

So What About Reading "Behind Sanity"?

 

The rewrite of "Behind Sanity" is over at Wattpad. Just Google "Wattpad Lani Lenore Behind Sanity" and you'll find it. I suggest reading up to Chapter 48, and then just quitting. Pretend it's another abandoned fanfiction novel. Read up to the point where Alice has just gotten the Jabberwock Eyestaff assembled and is leaving the Gnome Village. She turns around to look back and sees black smoke coming from the Gnome Village. This is where I suggest stopping reading.

"The Saw Chapter" is Chapter 52. If you must read all the way to the end, then skip Chapters 52 and 55. "The Saw Chapter" will give you nightmares, and Chapter 55 reprises those events. "The Saw Chapter" is the single sickest, grossest, nastiest thing I have ever seen in AMA fanfiction. Skip over it. I wish I could unsee it.


End file.
